Going through the Gate of Hospice

Sept 17, 2019

On Tuesday, September 17, 2019 Michael entered hospice care. 

It is not an admission of defeat, it is an acknowledgement that we are looking to maximize Michael’s time here. 

There are a number of benefits in doing this.

For years, we have been dealing with medications and lots of them. It would be nice if all the medications were able to be picked up at the same time. However, quite frequently schedules get messed up and numerous visits become necessary. This can become onerous when a person has many medicines. 

When one enters hospice, the nurse in charge deals with this and delivers the medications to your home. This saves me time and energy.

Also, the endless doctor’s visits end. Over the last years, we have had many many doctors and hospital visits. 

When you enter hospice, the medical staff comes to you. They renew, change and manage the medications. There will be no more Primary Care, Nephrology, Endocrinology, Ophthalmologist, etc. This is a relief because it was getting to the point where these medical appointments were of limited value. They also took energy away from Michael.

At the end of life there are also benefits. 

When a person dies suddenly (even if they have been ill) and they are not in hospice care, 911 is called to report the death.  You have to be prepared to deal with law-enforcement people.  The police or sheriff will investigate. 

Even if the death was expected (like when someone has chosen conservative care for kidney failure) and family was there, it will still be considered an “unattended” death unless a doctor was there or hospice was involved.

When you are admitted to hospice, you call the hospice nurse at the time of death. The nurse will come and help.  The trauma of an investigation will not occur. 

This was not something I understood until rather recently.

There are a number of other supports that will be helpful to us. 

Many people wait until the very end to enter hospice. But, for us the benefit is there to “ease” into this. The team will get a chance to know him and can help him medically. This can help him avoid ER/ hospital visits. This is a big goal. Michael wants to avoid that,as much as possible. 

Our goals are to maximize his “good” times. 

We want him to remain as comfortable as possible during this process.

He wants to remain open and present during the dying process. He hopes that others can learn from his experience. He hopes that others will be able to embrace their lives, right here, right now as their lives present themselves.

We want to walk this path with grace and humor.

This process is an opportunity for us to learn and a chance for us to share what we learn and what we already know.

If we can pass on knowledge and help others navigate their lives and their deaths, Michael will consider it a “good” death and a good life.